difficult

I don't want to say I'm tire again, but it is true.

I feel I'm lonely and breathless to solve those troubles around me, I need and expect someone to be with me and help me, solving it together with me.

I hate to make all the decisions on myself or people throw this responsibility for me, I don't want! I'm tire for all of that! I hate people to ask me do decision, especially on this kind of case, yet I seem like I have no choice to do decision since "they" throw the responsibility to me. If I cruel to someone, I'll feel sorry to he/she while if I cruel to myself, I'd feel myself is a stupid!

Why the thing is getting worst, difficult and complicated?

I hate it!

Why I feel hate when people rely on me?

Are you asking me opinions?

I don't want to be like that, I don't want to take this responsibility and don't want to be cruel to friend or myself! What choice I do, I'll feel sorry too, either I feel sorry to friends or myself. I don't want do this kind of thing!

Nobody can give me opinion in this case. What should I do?

Although, I want to be selfish, my heart is not allowing me to so!

How hope I'm cold-blooded!

I'm cool, they said. But I'm cold, why don't I'm cold, instead of cool?

I hate myself always do somethings stupid!

I don't know! I don't want! I only want to cry! Can I?

I need a shoulder, it is what I feel now.