be nothing

I don't know why everytime when I talk there is nobody listen to me.
This problem occur since I was a kid until today.
Is fine they didn't listen me.
Then, as long as I become much more quiet & dislike to talk & share so much.
Since I'm tire, really really really very tire.

Happiness, sadness, problems, the things I want, my thoughts...
Just keep inside.

Then, when the people around realise something wrong about me, that's too late.

Don't ask me, "Why you dislike to talk? Why you didn't answer me?..."
There is no point to ask you because I'd never say out the reasons.


1st time, 2nd time, 3rd time & there might have the 4th time I repeat.
But after that no more even when the case really happen when I told or just about to happen.

When some problems happen as I remind before, I won't say anything again.
I wish to prevent, but it is what you WANT.
The result, the ending you want.

I knew I'm not lovely, not even cute, pretty & vivid.
I don't mind I to be continue in this kind of life, I just don't understand why I'm still survive.
Perhaps, I'm not suppose to be here.

the next station

This will be my first time to leave my hometown, living at another state alone...
Perhaps, you may not feel so because there are quite many friends will study the same Uni with me also.
Nevertheless, they're not same course with me & I'm not close with them also.

I just feel little afraid & complicated to be there.

I gonna really face everything, problems & situations there by my own-self.
20, is time to be independent, right? But, I'm still scare of it.

"Be brave to face everything, is time to grow up!"


My brother who is younger than me only one year old & he'll graduate earlier than me maybe will around the same year also.
Uh, I feel the gov. is really wasting our time for just waiting. Why don't they process faster & quickly?
Even though, they make the process slow, they'd NEVER  make a prefect & right result also. (of course, I'm not talking mine..)

Can I graduate earlier than my brother?? >.<  
I don't want follow his back to graduate since I knew I'll still get nothing if I late than him.

nano ipod

my first Ipod here... this is my b'day present this year..
Today, I just try to learn it & try to use it...

finally I found that it is troublesome...

since the note at the box isn't detail at all... so I've to read it..

I wonder knw... who can teach me how to use except reading this???

look, I need to download the itunes...

& use itunes to download a program to suit with my ipod. >.<

so trouble..............