I hate all of this!!!!!!!!

Why nobody even think about my feelings, situations and conditions??

I hate all of that!! When on the way to back home, I thought a lots while driving just now. I straight away locked myself in my room after taking my bath.

I really cannot stand anymore! Why there is so unfair? Is that my fault?
I just feel like don't want to talk to anyone about this, no way, since none of you will really think about me!!

Everyone only cares about him, scaring of he will get hurt! Then, how about me? I hate you all keep saying him in front of me! I hate him so much!!!!!!!! He is disgusting for me!!!

Do you all think about my feelings when I see something (his act)? NO! YOU DIDN'T!!

Fine, I know, I shouldn't and I also don't want to hurt him. But the situation now is I cannot stand, I don't know how long I can patient all of that!!

Have you all even think about my feelings and thinking when you all said like that? Yea, however, you're telling the truth, have you think about me?

You all... only think about he cannot be hurt, he should be protected! Then, how about me?

Isn't just because of at least I won't become as him?

I could tell you, before he get hurt or becomes like that again, I'd depress and fall apart first!

Because of him, I cannot do what I want at school now?
Because of him, I should listen to your advice?
Because of him, I should always listen you all say like that?
Because of him, I need to be patience?
Because of him, I should not hurt him?
Because of him, I should far away to guys? It's sound funny!!

Because of him, I need to pretend and avoid his eyes side!!
Because of him, I feel disgusting at there!!
Because of him, I feel want to cry!
Because of him, I feel UNSAFE!!!
Because of him..........

Why nobody think about me? You all only know to tell me I should not!!
Then, should I give him hopes? Huh?
Then, will you all ask me to accept him? *chuckle*

I just want to be myself, okay?

*This is Patience's blog, if you're not satisfy, get away from here!*

Hmm...

Honestly, I really hate because of eldest of the family and cause those young's relationship become bad in the family.

I just try to be patient and pretend doesn't hear what they talk about, it is really hateful to know the ugly from them! I rather pretend don't know it.

It's a little bit out of my mind that Yang chatted so much to me at this morning. Erm... Well, I just hope that he will not disappointed me because he is same as my other cousins and brother. I don't know how to say, yet I just feel they are same when doing certain things. So, honestly, I have a little bit worry it now.

**************************************************

明明很讨厌，却还要带着笑来面对。。

明明很想生气，但觉得该收敛。。

明明很生气，却还要装得没事似的。。

明明很介意，却还要装得没什么。。

明明很忙，却还要做无聊的事。。

明明很想睡，却怎么也睡不着。。

明明就很想。。

*still have many... but, because I'm lazy to on my laptop, so someone is forcing me give her back her laptop now... zzz... *

Sept

Don't you feel that I become seldom to write a new blog? hahaha...

I'm lazy to write it. Sighs...

Alright, I think this Sept is the most busy month for me.

5th, the farewell party.

8th, my eldest sister will move to her new house.

9th, if success, we will have 6B gathering.

.....

so far I only remember until here, ahhahaa...

23th really want to have party at my house?
Erm... you all discuss first, these few days, I have no time to discuss.. hahahhaa..